Unfortunately, some relationships end abruptly or gradually without any real answer or specific reason as to why it ended. However, as with most relationships that end, there were often signs and signals suggesting it’s end maybe imminent. Yet, those in a romantic relationship typically fail to take notice or ignore the signs entirely. It is not unusual for those entering a relationship to think “this is the one” or this will be “forever”, but most people will meet, date, and be in a relationship multiple times before they find that happily ever after, if in fact they indeed find it.
Identifying he may no longer be interested in you can help those confused by the changes in the relationship make both emotional and physical adjustments to move on. Both acknowledging and confronting this realization one’s partner is no longer interested in you or the relationship can be very difficult and even painful to accept.
That being said here are a few warning signs to look for that man you are interested in may no longer be interested in you:
- Communication has changed. Early on in a health relationship he reaches out to you often, send very sweet and flattering texts to let you know he is thinking of you. However, when the relationship is on the decline you no longer get any messages from him and attempts to reach him fail. When you question him about it he has an arsenal of excuses ready, i.e., battery died, I turned my ringer off and didn’t know you called, left my phone at home, etc.
- He has a lot of new friends. Once he begins to lose interest in you and the relationship you often notice he has a lot of new female friends that he is in contact with. When you ask him about these friends most often he tell you he has known them for “years”, yet you have never spoken to or met any of them.
- Guarded with his phone. He never seems to answer the phone when you are together, making up an excuse as to why the call is not important. When he does answer the phone the call is rushed, he insists he was speaking to a man but the voice is distinctly female. Although, you hear a female voice the id on the phone is assigned a male’s name.
- Conflicting availability. He works a typical 9-5, with occasional overtime yet you can never seem to reach him in the evening hours anymore. When you ask him why you can no longer reach him at night he tells you, he is working late or asleep.
- Future Planning. When you attempt to discuss a future with him, he insists he is not in the “right mindset” to discuss a romantic future as he is focusing on his career, still traumatized from the hurt of an ex, etc.
- Changes in intimacy consistency and quality. When a man is interested in a woman he is usually very passionate in his expression of interest. When interest declines intimacy is one of the first things that take a significant nosedive, it will become inconsistent and almost obligatory to shut you up.
- He goes to social events without you. When a man is both interested in and attracted to you he takes pride in “showing you off”. However, when he is no longer interested in you he finds excuses as to why you should not accompany him to social events although this was never an issue in the past.
- His behavior towards you has changed. He is no longer engaged in any of his conversations with you. He speaks to you superficially without addressing anything real or concrete to you or your relationship. He no longer speaks to you in a loving manner but as “one of the boys”.
- Avoids contact with your family. When a man is interested in relationship with a man he wants to know everything about her, i.e., where are they from, their friends and family, goals, etc. However, when he is no longer interested in you or the relationship he does not want to meet your family as he is satisfied with the superficial information he already knows, i.e., what you look like, where you live, etc.
- Against PDA. When the relationship first started he holds your hand in public, he kisses and hugs you without regard for anyone else. However, when he is no longer interested in you he will avoid public displays of affection at all costs, insisting he doesn’t like to show affection in public.
Contributing Author: Terri Allen, Director of Nursing Services.